as i seek to become who Christ is calling me to be, there are hard truths that i have to wrestle with. before i can begin the wrestling process, there are things that i must accept and admit about myself. the first, i am a sinful person, filled with pride, hate and selfishness.
as Christians, it seems like we've been programed to believe that we have to portray a certain "portrayal" of Christianity. i call this portrayal, "imperfect perfection." what i mean by this is that we might admit to people that we struggle, but we rarely admit and confess the actual sin in our lives... but we are great at pointing out the flaws in other people... in fact, i'd say we're quite perfect at pointing out the imperfections of others.
the moment that we think... "i'd never do that"... or "i'd never behave like they did"... is the moment that you should start to worry. you see, yes you could do "that" or what "they did," and it's only by the grace of God that you haven't. (1 Corinthians 15:10 - But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace toward me was not in vain. On the contrary, I worked harder than any of them, though it was not I, but the grace of God that is with me.")
i've been spending a lot of time thinking through all of this and i came across a blog entry by anne jackson (author) that discusses this, so i decided to let you read it too.
(anne jackson's blog discusses having an affair... and that's not the purpose behind my post. the purpose is to remind you that apart from the grace of God, you're nothing but a sinful mess... and left to your own devices, you could do the unthinkable.)
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JULY 13, 2007 |
The title of this post is true. 100%. I could cheat on my husband. I remember several years ago, hanging out at my old church talking with one of my friends. I don’t know how we got on the subject but we started talking about infidelity and how nobody is immune from it.
She said,
“I could cheat on my husband. no doubt. I totally could.”
Her initial candidness surprised me at first, but within moments, I realized how right she was. Four staff members had fallen into the trap of an affair in this church, and several of our key volunteers had as well – all within a couple years. I remember everyone’s reaction who learned of the affairs:
“Never in a million years would I have thought…”
Exactly.
And let me tell you, I keep in touch with some of these people who were involved in the affairs, and they say the exact same thing:
“Never in a million years would I have thought…”
I love my husband. I adore him. He is the most generous and patient person in the world. And never in a million years would I think I could cheat on him.
It’s that mindset and letting down your guard where the devil would love to throw you in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong person and then before you know it…
You are the one who is looking in the mirror wondering how in the world you could have done it.
You are the one whose heart is pounding in your throat because you know you have to confess to your beloved.
You are the one who has to look your children in their eyes and explain why you’re going to be away for a while.
You are the one who is crumpled on the floor like a big ball of goo, weaping your entire being out in a deluge of tears and pain.
It could happen to me.
It could happen to you.
What are you doing to make sure it doesn’t?
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so what are you doing to make sure it doesn't happen?
you can't make sure it doesn't happen alone. you see, we are called to pursue sanctification (the process of becoming more like Christ) and that only happens when you have people in your life, who continually point you back to the Cross of Christ.
earlier this week, i heard the following statement, "sanctification is a community project." amen. and yet, we hide our mess from those around us, we don't admit to our own sinfulness, and we wonder why we fall... and fall hard.
but by the Grace of God, i have not... and i pray i never do.
